Satirical Whoopee Cusions for Trump and Congress

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VOLUME 1

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1 Our inaugural issue in more ways than one! Features Armed Freedom wearing her Women's March "pussy hat," Trump's Muslim internment camps and IDs, and so much more: even a "poetic" piece of Inaugural
Doggerel!

2     Explores erratic Trump's Russian connection & his assault on The Bill of Rights. Thomas Jefferson reports.

3 "Extreme vetting" of the President's financial holdings and tax filings? Maybe using torture as well? Or is there a better way?

4    Perform a testicular exam on some GOP members of Congress? A 12-step group especially for them? Oh my!

5      Will Rogers and Blazing Saddles: what's not to like? If, as Leonard Cohen's last album asked, "You Want It Darker" this won't disappoint. At the end, George Washington reminds us of our "better angels."

6     The National Zoo's "Ollie the Bobcat" out on a caper; real Trumpian "carnage" as hallucinations pose threats; plus, a philosopher unpacks the dangers of Fake News. What?

7     Of course Trump ignores Han Solo's advice: "Don't get cocky,kid!" Nat the Rooster makes his appearance and we share a ridiculous joke: all this as we explore Power!

8     Know any people addicted to public adulation? We take a stroll with Father Newel and he shares his take on an infamous one. Two forms of hot air balloons are involved.

9   Ah, Spring! A lost Michael Jackson verse to "Rockin' Robin"; extensive reporting on POTUS' Tweet demanding Congress defund NIH research; and to round it all off, KellyAnne Conway gets a new title! Sap's rising!

10 In celebration of President's Day, we look at the wisdom of some of our forefathers and foremothers; plus, we trace the genealogy of our 45th President. 'Splains a lot!

11 President Trump campaigned on how he would "drain the swamp" in Washington. This edition reveals why he's even making it swampier.

12   Armed Freedom breaks out in hives and consults Brother Levo Cetirizini for a remedy. See if Levo's advice will work for you!

13   Trump goads Congress into investigating the media as "enemies of the American People." Space Aliens tell all about Fox News! (Well, not space aliens: that would be Fake News. Nothing like that here at all!

14   Infestations of bacteria and fungi turn Washington into even more of a political swamp; Honda's new hybrid.
Food critic, Tom Sietsema reports.

15   A brief reflection on pelicans and a bit of "constructive" and ecologic-ally friendly criticism for the Administration.

16   The "Art" in The Art of the Deal. Spicer tries to explain it to the White House Press Corps.


17   Trump denies Spring is here; Spicer goes apoplectic about Trump and the "Easter Bunny."

18   In an effort to make America great again, Trump airs out his new environmental policies and touts new solutions to put coal miners back to work.

19   Some rhymes for our times during National Poetry Month provoke thought, skewer a few, and invite some laughs.

20   Show Boating Trump blows Comey out of the water. GOP health care negotiations a mirror image of Lincoln's cabinet. Trump proposes his new health care bill.

21   That was the week that was! WTF! New think tank, WTF, holds its first meeting. Psychological and theological views of Trump and how his presidency might end should he be impeached. WTF!

22   We visit the back ward of America's craziness and examine public "stupidity," and Trump's dangerous narcissism. Monty Python, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and the cartoon Non Sequitur leaven this informative and provocative rant.

23   A brief reflection on what we must remember in light of the shooting in Alexandria, VA on June 14, 2017.

24   Dr. Seuss, Yertle the Turtle, the Red Hot Chili Peppers, the Bible, and a fun re-do of the Robin Hood theme song conspire to take the conspiratorial Mitch McConnell to task over his creating the Senate's "healthcare" bill in secret

25   A brief reflection on Trump's dangerous need for pumping up his ego by grabbing the privates. A new medication may help.

26 A requiem for the GOP. Cause of death: failure to honor their oath of office. Also a GOP funeral song: "A Finger to the Wind."

27 Signs of hope as even GOP members push back against Trump's behavior. Also:
Anthony Scaramucci and slugs. Redundant?

28 A theological reflection on Trumpism after the "Unite the Right" riots in Charlottesville. And, just in time for the solar eclipse, a suitable prayer. Sort of.

29 America is finally in eclipse. Trump moons nation coast-to-coast.

30 Houston, we have a problem. Responses to the flood, the Antifa, and Mel Brooks' Moses reveals the lost 5 of the original commandments. What, you want more?!

31 Hurricane Irma blows Rush Limbaugh out to sea and, with heartfelt apologies to her, we revise Emma Lazarus' poem about the Statue of Liberty. Batten down the hatches!

32 Time to restore some sanity. So we give you a chance at making paper dolls of Trump and his cabinet. There's always Room(ba) for fun as Shark Week comes to Freedom's View!

33 Found: a new mascot for "The Resistance! Where's a Harry Potter wand when you need it?

34 Pence's speech about returning astronauts to the moon comes to
an unfortunate end. Steve Bannon weighs in on how Hillary is to blame.

35 Linus thinks he finally saw The Great Pumpkin rise out of the Pumpkin Patch! Will he be vindicated at last? We tell all.

36 Just in time for Thanksgiving prepar-

ations, Speaker of the House Paul Ryan turns chef on the Food Network. He shares the new GOP recipe for stuffing, and demonstrates how to stuff the turkey. Benjamin Franklin lends a helping hand.

37 Liar, liar, pants on fire! A meditation on sartorial conflagrations and how to cope with inflammatory situations such as the GOP's "Tax Reform."

38 A substantial Letter to the Editor about abusers in the White House and Congress. A poem on the 5th anniversary of the shooting at Newtown, CT.

39       Special year-end indigestion issue. Strategies for continuing to resist Trump's dismantling of our democracy. More on Trump's brain by his doctor!

40   The Last Jedi sheds light on a way forward for the political resistance. Father Newel Post comments on the movie and warms up Armed Freedom.

41   Our biggest edition yet! Six pages of how to stay sane in our newly insane world. Hint: M*A*S*H unit shows us how to stay sane; a new song for you to sing; AND, special guest columnist Will Rogers gives us some effective, fun ways to help our beleaguered country! Whew! Who knew?

42 A Martin Luther King, Jr. Day meditation on realizing our nation's motto, e. pluribus unum through an aware- ness of our division-transcending common humanity. Especially relevant, given Trump's abhorrent, racist characterization of people of color living in "shithole nations."

43 Something may or may not be rotten in Denmark, Norway, or one of those other white-ish countries. Here in the wonderfully diverse USA, something is Casu Marzu! We take on how Trump's lying and the Trumpists' Party of Political Prevarication is threatening the reporting thereof. This is a fun piece for those of you who love word-play!

44 On the eve of Trump's beginning his second year in office, we take a break to celebrate. We honor some of The Washington Post's commentators by awarding, for the first time ever, our Thumpies. Enjoy!

THIS IS THE END OF VOLUME 1 EDITIONS.